Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Fighting is an option

As usual, during long drives we listened to Dr. Laura.  We listened to a lot of callers during both our drive to Interlochen and coming back home.  Some of Dr. Laura's reply stood out.  I would like to share this one.

One woman married her high school sweetheart and have a 12 year old daughter and a 9 year old son.  She was in the process of a divorce and her reason for calling is because her 12 year old daughter is not happy about the divorce and the mom don't know what to do.  She has fallen out of love and is always fighting with her husband.

This is not verbatim.  But as close as I can remember it.  Dr. Laura's reply was:  Don't continue with the divorce.  Our society has learned to give up on relationships so easy.   If you divorce, eventually there will be another woman to deal with and another man as well.  Then other set of kids.  Stop the fighting.  Fighting is an option.  There are days when one of us will have a crappy day and will snap.  But choose not to fight.  Instead bring back the romance.  You had it once, you will have it again.

Personally, I think all kinds of relationship is a work in progress.  Although dating definitely is the most exciting relationship wherein involved parties put only their best foot forward.  Years into the marriage and we see not just the good but also the bad side of each other.  Arguments, misunderstandings and disagreements will be around.  The trick is in solving the problems.  We argue with our parents who have known us ever since, with our siblings and friends but we don't give up on them.

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